Mother's Day without my mom

Last year on Mother's Day I gave my mom a stepping stone that I had made, she loved it so much that she displayed it proudly in the front yard. This year, I only had memories of my sweet, loving mom. I never would have thought that I would be spending a Mother's Day without my mom so soon in my life. It's very hard for me to let go and know that she is in the best place ever.  Sometimes I get caught up in my own "woe is me" moments and I forget how wonderful it is that she is with our Creator. Can't we have the best of both worlds? Some day... some day.

I think about her often and I always imagine what she would be doing or saying at any given time. Sometimes it brings huge smiles to my face and other times it leaves me heartbroken.

I try really hard to keep her memory alive with Alivia. We talk about her often and we always mention that we miss Grandma Bekki.  I like to think that Alivia will always remember her, she was Grandmas pride and joy! Alivia was so spoiled by Grandma, it wasn't even funny! They could play outside with each other all day long! Bubbles, bike rides, and park visits were their favorite activities among many others. I just know that Weston would have been just as special to her if she would have met him.

When I think about my mom, I remember her to be very dedicated to whatever she did.  She made sure that us kids were happy, the house was spotless... and I mean SPOTLESS, and dinner on the table every night. She worked very hard and didn't get very much appreciation from us at the time. She was always being goofy and playful, I loved that about her. At times she would drive me nuts, but that was mom!

I am so afraid of forgetting her and the things that she did and said, so it is my mission to keep the memories alive. I am thankful to have her in a few videos so I can hear her voice and we have a lot of pictures of her, mostly of her being goofy! I miss her so much and am trying to figure out how to survive without my good friend, my phone buddy, my go-to person, my children's grandma.... my mom.

I miss you, mom. Thank you for being you and for raising me to be a good mom myself. Thank you for loving me unconditionally and for being so wonderful to Alivia. I will see you again some day and when that day comes, you better have the biggest hug waiting for me, because I sure could go for one right about now! I love you with all of my heart...until we meet again <3 Happy Mother's Day

Playing Catch Up

What an adventure the past few months have been with the kids! We are still trying to figure out how to manage two kids, I like to think that we are finally getting it down. Weston has been such a different baby than Alivia was and it is fun to compare the two, each having their own little quirks. Weston has proven that he is a very good eater; At three months old he weighs a whopping 17 pounds and 5 ounces. We have made several doctor visits due to an ongoing viral infection and to see an ENT specialist. The viral infection is just hanging on which leaves us with having to give Weston nebulizer treatments in hopes to get rid of the nasty stuff. The doctor thought that Weston had a very small chin and wanted us to get it checked out, so we did. It is a condition called Micrognathia and it can be a problem if the child has a hard time breathing or eating, neither of which is a concern for Weston. Hopefully his chin will catch up with the rest of him otherwise we will have a hefty orthodontic bill when he gets older. Other than the virus and the chin issues, it has been a lot of fun watching the boy grow and do new things. He loves trying to sit up from laying down, he can't quite get up but is getting some good abdominal workouts. Weston has rolled from his back to his tummy twice, but I don't know if it was intentional.

Alivia will be three in less than a month. I am still trying to decide what we should do for her birthday. The last two birthdays have been a rather big ordeal and I would like to keep that going, but I don't know if it's feasible this year. Either way, I hope she has a lot of fun and knows that she is very loved! She has been potty trained for a couple of months now and it has been a huge relief! We just have to work on the night time training and then we will be set! We have her all signed up for preschool in the fall, it will be a bittersweet transition for me! She will be happy to get out of the house and learn new things and I will love the "break", but I will be sad that I can't be there and experience all of the new things with her. She is such a smart girl and she needs more than what I can offer to her, so it will be a good thing. She started drawing faces, which is something that kids start when they are around the age of 4 to 5. I am so proud of her artistic abilities! She definitely has some sass to her and sometimes I am not sure if I should send her to time out or laugh! Often times I catch myself giggling and shaking my head at how grown up she acts. I am in for a treat when she's a teen, I can just tell!